Single Married Lifestyle: I Feel So Betrayed and Hurt


Single Married Lifestyle


And so I came across this story of a single (divorced) mom of two and she is asking: "What will you do if you were in my shoes?. She feels she is better off alone with her teenage kids after two failed marriages and this is her story.


Married Young but Divorced (first husband)


I live abroad with my family. I was married at the early age of 21 and have 2 children, but due to domestic violence, I left with my children and became homeless at 27 years old in the United Kingdom. I was a student in the University at the time. I graduated and got a good job that pays £1000 a week, which is about £4,000 a month. I gave my children the best they could ever want and also bought a house in London.


I remained divorced until almost 8 years later when I remarried. My children were now older teenagers, my oldest was my chief bridesmaid. My new husband have no children previously. He knows my history. He was living in a one-room within a shared house when we met.


After the marriage, he moved into my house to join me and my children. He earns £1000 a month whilst I earned this in a week. So naturally, I was responsible for all the bills in the house whilst he contributed little. That was not a problem for me.


The Infidelity


The issue is that he has a habit of chatting with women online. About every 3 to 6 months I will catch him. We have been married for about 3 years. I think he is desperately looking for a child since I have not been able to conceive. I have seen him telling women to have a child for him. They exchange nude pictures and other messages.


My family, his family, and even our pastor have begged me on his behalf to forgive him, but he keeps doing it. I recently saw another message on his phone to a woman, this resulted in an argument and for the first time he pushed me and I hit my head on the TV mounted on the wall, he immediately said sorry on his knees. I told him he has crossed the line.


My oldest child said she heard me falling even though she did not see it, but it reminded her of what she saw when I was with her father when she was younger. She said this made her cry. My family and husband are begging me again, but I can't do this anymore. I fear that the next argument will be worst than this cause I now know he can't change from going after women and I cannot keep quiet about it.


His presence and touch now irritate me. I know people will say I had two failed marriages at 40. I have asked him to leave my house so he can go and find someone else to have children for him. I cannot stand the cheating, can't stand him touching me, his presence irritates me now after he pushed me and exposed my children to all this. I cannot even bring myself to feel intimate with him because I feel so betrayed and hurt. I think I am better off on my own as I do not also need him to survive.


What would you do if you were in my shoes?


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